We found our old camcorder this weekend and watched home movies from our wedding reception and when Milo was a baby. We stood there watching all of these moments of our life together getting all choked up. The fact is that Jon and I are giant, sentimental dorks. We say dorky things and look pretty dorky most of the time. But in the majority of the videos we’re laughing and that cannot be a bad thing.
Being married to your best friends has its perks. There is someone there to tell you you have buggies or that knows never to leave dirty socks in the living room, someone who will say nice things to you on demand (although he might get sick of you constantly asking for sweetsies),someone who will be honest about your work, someone who will laugh at your really bad jokes and someone who will always be there to let you sniff their beard. But marriage ain’t always the easiest thing. Living your life tethered to someone can be the most comforting thing in the world and the most constraining. Sometimes you feel so close that you’re one person and other times you’re worlds apart, and that’s ok as long as you know that a life well lived is a life lived with your partner.
But that Jon Fessler, I’ve loved that man ever since I walked into the house on 13th st. Five years after I had first met him and he stood up when I came through the door and said, “Hi, I’m Jon.” in a super awkward way. We went to see Hot Water Music and he stayed in the under 21 section to keep me company. The next night he grabbed my elbow and asked me on a date. On our first date we drank a pitcher of PBR and ate bread sticks. The next day he brought a grocery bag full of daisies into the coffee shop where I worked and I was totally gaga. Before he headed to Alaska for the summer, he gave me his Super Friends pillow case and plastic mug with a smiley face and feet to remember him by. We spent the following summer totally in LOVE, exchanging letters and packages while Jon lived in a tent inside of a tent down by a river. You’ve never heard a more romantic love story, have you?
Almost ten years have gone by. We’ve built a home and a family complete with a rottweiler and a shed made out of shipping pallets. He’s still my best friend and he still sometimes makes me crazy. We had a family weekend this weekend; bacon egg and cheese biscuits for dinner, checking on the art and picking up Milo’s first check, donuts and beer, bad tv (after Milo went to bed) and lots of chit chat with conversations that start with, “you know what would be awesome…” and planning our future in a million and one directions. All while drinking tea and snuggling our kids.
It can be really hard to remember that people don’t know what you need until you tell them. Men are from Mars women are from Venus…But, the weather is cool and the house is warm and we’re staying in. Love you Papa bear.
PS We’ve made some great trades so far, keep ’em coming!